


The Trouble With Vodka

by Saral_Hylor



Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Gen, M/M, Prompt Fill, Text Messages, Texts From Last Night
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-12-31
Updated: 2013-12-31
Packaged: 2018-01-06 21:50:59
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 736
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1111904
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Saral_Hylor/pseuds/Saral_Hylor
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Prompt fill: Avengers - Tony - I don’t know what it is about vodka that makes me ruin relationships</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Trouble With Vodka

**Author's Note:**

> Prompt left on fic_promptly by [jujitsuelf](http://archiveofourown.org/users/jujitsuelf/pseuds/jujitsuelf)
> 
>  
> 
> Thanks to [quandong_crumble](http://archiveofourown.org/users/quandong_crumble/pseuds/quandong_crumble), [jujitsuelf](http://archiveofourown.org/users/jujitsuelf/pseuds/jujitsuelf) and [3White_Mage3](http://archiveofourown.org/users/3White_Mage3/pseuds/3White_Mage3) for the read throughs.

**Tony to group:** I don’t know what it is about vodka that makes me ruin relationships

**Natasha to Tony:** Stark, don’t blame the vodka for your short comings. It is a thing of true beauty and should only be appreciated.

**Tony to Natasha:** Should have known you Russians would stick together.

**Natasha to Tony:** I know where my loyalties lie.

**Tony to Natasha:** I don’t even know how to take that, Tash. You are one scary lady. And I’m going to hide until next year sometime when you finally forget that I said that.

**Natasha to Tony:** You do that Tony. You do that.

 

**Thor to Tony:** Aye, I have seen alcohol have this effect on people before. Even in Asgard many relationships fall ruin because of mead.

**Tony to Thor:** Good to know it’s an intergalactic condition, and I’m not the only fuck up in the world.

**Thor to Tony:** If you require a drinking partner to help you through this sad time, I will be in the Tower for the foreseeable future. I am told that it is customary in Midgard, to drink and grieve and support one another in such times. In Asgard, we fight. We can do that, if you prefer.

**Tony to Thor:** Thanks buddy, maybe not right now. I think JARVIS might have locked me out of the suits given my BAC.

 

**Coulson to Tony:** Cease and desist Stark, that’s all I’ll say.

**Tony to Coulson:** You’re a robot anyway, what would you know about emotional pain?

 

**Bruce to Tony:** Tony, I’m sure if you really looked, you’d realised you haven’t ruined anything at all. It was one argument. Even your relationships have survived arguments before. And you have to admit, you were kind of being a drunk arse, and said a few nasty things.

**Tony to Bruce:** Oh go jump Big Green. You’re supposed to be on my side.

**Bruce to Tony:** I’m not picking sides. You’re both my friends, and I’m trying to be objective. I’m not even this type of doctor!

**Tony to Bruce:** Not going to talk to you if you’re going to be all grown up and rational.

**Bruce to Tony:** Well someone around here has to be.

 

**Clint to Tony:** Dude, you think you’ve got it bad, I drink vodka and START relationships.

**Tony to Clint:** I’m not feeling sorry for you birdbrain.

**Clint to Tony:** Not feeling sorry for you either dickwaffle, whatever you did, serves you right.

**Clint to Tony:** Hang on, who were you even dating?

 

**Steve to group:** You didn’t ruin anything. Haven’t ruined anything. But you didn’t have to go and get drunk just because I said I love you.

**Natasha to Steve:** Um, Cap, that went to all of us.

**Bruce to Steve:** Hope you were ready for that Steve, because everyone knows now.

**Thor to Steve:** I do not believe that we were the intended recipients of this declaration.

**Clint to Steve:** DUDE! Way to come out! Congrats. You know. It’s cool, just in case you were scared of that. But Stark? Could do better man, could do better. Though I hear that he’s supposed to be great in bed.

**Steve to group:** Fuck.

 

**Tony to Steve:** Ignoring the fact that you just told everyone, I think getting drunk was a perfectly good response to what you said. You don’t just go saying that to a guy. Especially when he’s going down on you. I almost choked!

**Steve to Tony:** Sorry my timing was a little off. I’ve never told anyone that before.

**Tony to Steve:** It’s okay, I know you didn’t mean it. Caught in the moment and all that. We’ll forget you ever said it.

**Steve to Tony:** Tony, I did mean it.

**Steve to Tony:** Tony, open the door.

**Tony to Steve:** Nope

**Steve to Tony:** Open the door.

**Tony to Steve:** No way Cap

**Steve to Tony:** Well, I’ll wait then. Until you get it through your thick skull that I meant it. I love you. I’ll keep saying it until you believe it.

**Tony to Steve:** Why are you still sitting out there? J said you’ve been out there for two hours now.

**Steve to Tony:** Because you’re not the only stubborn one.

**Tony to Steve:** What do you want Cap?

**Steve to Tony:** I want you to come to bed. So I can prove I meant it.

**Tony to Steve:** Oh…


End file.
